How to Control Emotions Effectively: 11 Steps

Emotion is a feeling, a sensation, mood, such as happiness, love, anger or hatred, fear. Emotion can have such a great impact, influence on individuals, society or group, be it positive or negative. That’s why the subject of how to control emotions is important.

Human feelings can easily change, meaning it is never dependable, it cannot be relied upon and this calls for the discussion on how to control feelings. It is important to know how to control emotions.

Emotions can be disastrous, destructive, and before it gets to that, we have to teach you how to be able to control it effectively.

The positive ones like happiness, love, are rather constructive, beneficial, productive and profitable. There’s still need to control the positive emotions because too much of anything can be an issue.

Here are a few tip on how you can effectively control your emotions:

How To Control Emotions

#1. Understand The flesh vs the spirit

Feelings are suggestions from the flesh. The nervous system that control feeling is buried just beneath the skin. When it has to do with the spirit, the fesh profits nothing. Man is a spirit and only lives in the flesh.

Satan cease the opportunity of the fact that the flesh is not spiritual and use it to fight the spirit.

The flesh is completely a physical thing, nothing spiritual about it. All the feelings and actions of the flesh are contrary to God’s mindset or the word of God. That is why God cannot work with the flesh, and the devil took advantage of this.

The flesh is an enemy of the spirit. The flesh fights the spirit, it means the flesh fights God. The flesh will always go contrary to what God expects, it will always suggest the opposite to biblical standard.

The flesh or feelings fights God 24/7, your feeling is an enemy of God. Your feelings will always go against everything written in the bible.

What am I saying? if you follow your flesh, you will become an enemy of God. This should tell you out rightly that it is the devil manipulating your feelings. When it is time to pray, your body will feel weak, you will always feel bible study is boring.       

To go to church, you have to struggle with your feelings. You will never feel good to give.  

#2. Renew your mind

The good news is that emotion can be tamed, it can be controlled. Once your mind is renewed with the knowledge of the word of God, your emotions will be controlled.

You cannot have the mindset of God and be living by the dictates of your flesh. Developing the mindset of God means your spirit has been empowered to take over the dominion and authority over your being.

At this point your spirit now has rule over your flesh. Your spirit decides. Your emotions has authority and rule over you because your spirit is weak, not fed.

Your spirit is connected to God. It supposed to receive from God to run or manage your entire being. Your spirit can never be of any benefit to your being if your mind is not renewed.

Mind renewal is to completely change your thought pattern from the natural perspective to that of the word of God which equals God mindset.

For your mind to be thinking like God means it has eaten so much of the word of God to an extent that it can never think otherwise.

This is how God lives in a man. When the word of God lives in you, God is living in you because the word of God is God. Your emotions are subdued by knowledge of the word of God. The word of God will teach you how to love, not to hate, not to bear grudge, not to be offended, to forgive. These are some of the negative attributes that infiltrate your emotions.

The word is water that will clean, wash out all the negative and replace them with the positive attributes. If you spend quality time on The word consistently, after a while you’ll find out that you cannot be easily upset.

This is a sign that you’re getting matured spiritually. This is how to control emotions. The word of God is God himself. As you eat the word of God, you are eating God till you become a god. Once you’re a god, you are in authority and dominion.

This is where you are dead to the flesh. Dieing to the flesh simply means you can never be controlled by your emotions anymore. This is how to control emotions.

This is the same remedy for all the gateways, simple, renew your mind with the word of God. You cannot do without the word of God, in every issue as a believer, the solution is always the word of God, this one thing.

How to Control Feelings

It is not possible that your feelings can contribute anything to the success of your destiny and future, even naturally. This is one of the reason this article is very significant to a lot of people. I still believe more than 80% of the human race still live by their feelings;

The bible which contains the word of God is our manual for day to day living. The word of God is the mindset of God. Like father like son. If you are a child of God, you must develop the mindset of God, if you don’t think like God, you cannot live like God.

You must look like your father. God is a spirit, you are a spirit too. You can only live by the dictates of the spirit of God through the knowledge of the word of God. The spirit of God cannot work with you if you don’t think like God. Anything outside of the word of God, count the Holly Spirit and the angels out. They will never be there. They are on earth only for the word of God.

St. John 6:63

It is the spirit that quickeneth; the flesh profiteth nothing: the words that I speak unto you, they are spirit, and they are life.

How to Change Your Mindset

The only path that dictates how to control emotions is using the word of God to change our mindset. This is the foundation of Christianity. Once you are born again, the next thing on the agenda must be to change your mindset.

The born again process affect only your spirit. Nothing happened to the mind. After being born of God, your spirit becomes new. That “old thing have passed away, behold all things have become new” all happened to your spirit. Your mind is definitely still the old mind. The old adamic, corrupt, satanic stronghold.

You can never work with God using this mindset and you are the one to change it, not God. You don’t lookup to God for this one, you must lookup to yourself. And you are using the word of God to make this change by completely eradicating the entire old ideology from the pit of hell and replacing it with the mindset of heaven which is the word of God.

You have to sit with the word of God day and night. When you used to spend all night in the club, spending time with imoral women, sitting around with friends and everything you hear were negative; you were building a mindset.

All your life time, the news you listen to, the newspapers you read, the school you went to, songs you listen to have been building a mindset on you that completely contradict both the mind of God and your destiny.

This is because if it was God that formed that destiny for you, then you can never and will never be able to achieve it with the mindset that is not of God. God used his mindset to build your destiny, therefore the destiny must be achieved with the mindset of God..

This means the former mindset was a total setup by the devil to destroy both you and your destiny. The bible has informed us that the devil does not go anywhere but for to kill, to steal and to destroy.

Therefore if Satan ocheastrate a mindset for you, it is for your destruction. In other words the former mindset you had was a setup to destroy you.

Jesus said the words that I speak to you, they are spirit and they are life. Therefore the new mindset God wants you to change to is also a setup to give you life. It is left for you to choose; life or death.

This is the reality of life my brother or sister. All is not done after you are born again. These are the two major aspect of Christianity; being born again and mind renewal.

Now, I have to stress on the mind renewal. Apart from some of the things you need, that will aid in renewing your mind, which are: baptism of the Holy Spirit, spirit of understanding and revelation, you need time and commitment.

You can pray for God to give you the spirit of understanding and revelation, a pastor or matured brother can help you get the baptism of the Holly Spirit, but your time and commitment towards achievement of this purpose is imminent.

Before you got born again, you spent the whole of your years on earth acquiring or building that old mindset, maybe you got born again at twenty, thirty, fourty or even fifty years old or more.

This means you have used the past twenty or fifty years to build a particular mindset. How long do you think it will take to completely eradicate that old mindset and build a new one.

This should determine the time you invest towards achieving this goal. Man as a whole likes trying out things. If you invest two hours per day, after a year, find out how far you could go.

Maybe from there, you can double it to four hours per day. It all depends on how important this is to you. Bear in mind that without renewing your mind, you cannot start the journey to your destiny, because the new mindset you are required to have carries the road map to your destiny.

Until you completely renew your mind, nothing significant will workout between you and God, because your thoughts would be completely different from God’s thought pattern. Your old mindset was build on demonic way of thinking. It was curated by Satan.

God is light and can never work with darkness. When you got born again, your spirit was moved from the kingdom of darkness into the kingdom of light but your mind was not moved. You have to conciously move your mind to the kingdom of light by completely renewing it with the knowledge of the word.

I don’t know how important God is to you. I don’t even know who you take him to be. Maybe your education is more important, or your job. Many knows how to play the hipocrisy thing.

But if you want to absolutely leave the outcome of your life to depend on God’s input, then I think you should suspend your education or job for a while, and invest at least five years of your life on earth on the word of God full time. Just spend time on the word of God from morning till evening, everyday for five years.

Does that sound like you are going to waste time? or secure your destiny? Whichever one you choose here depends on how much you know God and value him.

I don’t know why you will choose to be a Christian and are not ready to work with God by faith, then you should as well forget any inheritance, any good thing from God apart from your salvation.

Salvation is to qualify you for eternal life which is in heaven. Mind renewal is for the success of your life here on earth. It is for God to be able to make input in your life here on earth, not in heaven. If you don’t need the input of God in your life on earth, you can ignore it.

The entire road map to your destiny, from start to finish is burried on your new mindset. Everything you need to go along with, every city and country you need to pass through, friends you should meet, and those to avoid, everything is burried in there.

Attribute of Emotions that makes it not dependable

Satan incorporated your old mindset to allign with your emotions. You did whatever you feel like doing. There are things you need to understand when it has to do with emotions.

* They will always work to destabilize you

i know you have never been aware of this until now. Whenever you get emotional or angry, you always get destabilized, and whether you know it or not, this act will always cost you something at the end of the day. Once you are unstable, you will make mistakes. This is an ochestration to destroy your destiny.

If you make important decisions when you are angry, it may turn out to cost you more than you can bear because of the mistakes.

* Emotions are a bundle of distraction.

Oh yes, it is a placement to distract you from your destiny. What you will see are momentary distractions, but the sum of it all is to take you away from your destiny.

* It will always slow down your achievement rate

It will slow down your growth rate in all ramification, spiritual, physical. If you always go by your feelings, you may be eating things that will make you stunted instead of growing tall. You do not always feel like waking up early. Your feelings can make you go to work late, go to school late.

Your emotions will never allow you to think straight.

* Your Emotions are not disciplined,

It feels anything. You will always feel like eating dinner at five star hotel, even when you don’t have the money. This is why people live above what they have just because they feel like it without the capacity, and some would have to steal to get on with that feeling.

You will feel like eating food that is not healthy. Fornication is a feeling, adultary, smoking, stealing, backbiting, gluttony, drinking, and many of such habits, all comes from your feelings. Until you are able to discipline yourself, you will always fall a victim.

* Your Emotions are not informed

Decisions are supposed to be made out of knowledge. Your feelings doesn’t know foods that are good for your health. You will never feel like eating a particular food because it is healthy. If you want to eat something healthy, it is out of knowledge, not feelings.

#3. Be Born Again

Born again is activating a relationship with God. It’s accepting the death and resurrection of Jesus to save your soul. This is a spiritual experience that affect just your spirit man.

#4. Build A Relationship With the Holy Spirit

  • Stay on the word always with the spirit of revelation and understandin

Who is the Holy Spirit?

This is where a lot of Christians, even believers do not understand. A lot of people including believers are ignorant of the ministry of the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit is the third person in trinity but it is equally important.

We did not hear so much about Jesus in the Old Testament. According to the bible, God the father was the one

Communicating with the Israelite, Moses, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, David, all the prophets and so on. We did not hear a mention of Jesus nor the Holy Spirit in the Old Testament.

Therefore the personality that presented himself all through the Old Testament was God the Father.

And God promised them Jesus will come as their savior. And at a point Jesus actually came.

Immediately Jesus came, the father was no more appearing or communicating with them, he pulled off from the scene completely, except when he officially announced Jesus at the point of baptism.

Matthew 3:17
And lo a voice from heaven, saying, This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.

Jesus was on earth till he fulfilled what he came to do and announced that he was leaving the earth but that another personality is replacing him, just the way he replaced the father, and that personality is the Holy Spirit.

I am still surprised, very, very surprised, but what is wrong with MAN, oh man.

Jesus said;

It is expedient that I go away, because if I do not go away, the comforter will not come.

This is how important the Holy Spirit is.

1 it is expedient I go away, meaning I will leave the earth, meaning for now every work on earth is handed over to another.

2, it is very important that the comforter will come

Why The Holy Spirit Came

To teach and to show you the word of God


  1. THE father is no more having any direct commitment on earth
  2. Jesus is no more having any direct commitment on earth
  3. The Holy Spirit Came to teach us the word

Oh man all your attention should now be turned to the word of God.


All your attention should be turned to the word, and the Holy Spirit will help you in its understanding. The implication is that from now on, God can only relate with man through. The arrival of the Holly Spirit was the transition to the dispensation of knowledge.

I do not know what you will need the father and Jesus again for, than to worship and thank and praise.


So, having understood who the Holy Spirit is, we can now discuss the baptism of the Holy Spirit.

Holy Spirit Baptism

Jesus told the disciples to tarry in Jerusalem till ye are endued with power. This is the power to become sons of God. For you to live like Christ, live the Christian Life, you need power, you need the grace that is from God.

Holy Spirit baptism is simply the spirit of God coming on you with an evident of speaking in tongues.

To endue means to provide with ability. This is the spirit of God coming on you, giving you the power, the divine enablement to work with God. It will give you the ability to do many things, including to understand the bible, the spirit of revelation and understanding.

Therefore to control your feelings, after being born again and baptized with the Holy Spirit, you stay on the word of God with the spirit of revelation and understanding. This is how to control your emotions.

What it Means to Die to the Flesh

When you consistently spend time with the word of God, your mind will be renewed, your spirit will be built.

The word of God will renew your mind, build your spirit to be able to subdue your flesh. This is what it means to die to the flesh. It means you are no more living by the dictates of the flesh. The word of God is your spiritual food, once your spirit eats enough and enlarge, it will subdue the flesh.

If your spirit is not build up, the flesh will overpower it and be dictating the pace. When your mind is renewed, you will have the mind of Christ and think like God. When you are able to think like God, you will have the God kind of faith. The God kind of faith takes you directly into the realm of power, Dominion, authority.

At this point you will be able to excersise authority on earth as a son. You will judge everything, make decision after the knowledge of God. This means you live by the word of God, not the dictates of the flesh. When you don’t know the mind of God, your flesh will suggest anything on the contrary.

When you know the mind of God on a subject, you be automatically silenced the flesh on that area.

When you think like God, you will be having results like God.

The bible simply recommends that we should renew our mind with the word of God

#5. Spend Quality Time To Study The Word Of God

Saturate your mind with the word of God, let the whole of your being be filled with the word, then you will think like God, you will feel like God. The word of God builds your spirit to overpower your flesh, to silence the flesh. This is how to control your Emotions

This is what bible mean by dying to the flesh, you are no more sensitive to the dictates of the flesh, you are only sensitive to God. God is the one always talking through your spirit. The flesh will be completely silenced.

When God wants you to do something, he puts an urge in you, not feelings, so feelings can be completely subdued in the system. It is only when your spirit is not build up and is weak, that is when your flesh will be lively, but if you build your spirit, your flesh is silenced.

Controlling emotions can be a challenging task, but there are several strategies that can help manage and regulate your feelings effectively:

#6. Mindfulness:

Practice being aware of your emotions without judgment. Mindfulness techniques, such as deep breathing, meditation on the word of God , and grounding exercises, can help you stay present and manage your emotions till they are completely tamed by the word of God as you renew your mind.

#7. Identify triggers:

Pay attention to what situations, thoughts, or people trigger certain emotions in you. Once you identify these triggers, you can work on managing your responses to them.

You need to know that some level of anger are demonic and needs deliverance through prayer and fasting.

If you notice your emotions are out of control, a pastor or someone with a higher level of spiritual authority can help pray for you to be delivered. You can equally chat is on WhatsApp to help you out.

#8. Express emotions:

Find healthy ways to express your emotions, such as talking to a trusted friend, journaling, or engaging in creative activities like painting or music.

#9. Physical activity

Regular exercise can help release pent-up emotions and reduce stress. Physical activity also releases orphins, which can improve your mood.

#10. Self-care:

Take care of yourself by getting enough sleep, eating well, and engaging in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Self-care is important for emotional well-being.

#11. Seek support:

Don’t hesitate to reach out to a therapist, counselor, or support group if you’re struggling to control your emotions. Professional help can provide you with tools and strategies to manage your feelings effectively.

Remember, it’s normal to experience a range of emotions, but when they are out of control, it’s not normal, and it’s okay to seek spiritual help when you need it.

Learning to control normal emotions is a process that takes time and practice, so be patient and kind to yourself as you work on developing healthier emotional regulation skills. But believe me, the word of God is the only cure, permanent cure.

You cannot reject Jesus. You were created by Jesus for Jesus. God created you for himself. To reject Jesus is to rebel against God. Jesus is your life, to reject Jesus is to reject your life. Give your life to Jesus today, accept Jesus into your heart and be born of God now, it may be late after now!!!!! Do not postpone. Please follow this steps to obey God now..

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